If we do have doubt, we should not try to suppress it. Suppression is the worst thing. I have always said that if we suppress something today, then tomorrow the negative forces inside us that we are trying to suppress will come out vehemently and try to destroy us. When it comes to the vital life, emotional life or drinking and smoking, I always say that we have to purify and illumine ourselves slowly. If a doubt comes and we try to destroy it through suppression, it will not be destroyed. It will only wait for another opportunity to come, when we are weaker. At that time doubt will come again and make us insane.
When doubt comes, the best thing is to accept it as non-reality or unreality. In the ultimate reality, when we realise God, there is no doubt. At that time we ourselves are the reality. So when doubt comes, first we accept it and then we try to transform it into faith or illumine it. But right now we can’t negate it or hide its existence. If doubt comes and we tell others, “I have no doubt,” that is total falsehood.
In the human life who doesn’t have doubt? Perhaps someone has only one doubt and another person has countless doubts. If one has countless doubts, it is like having, let us say, countless obstacles on the physical plane. But we can take these obstacles as opportunities. We will not welcome an obstacle, but if it stands in our way, we shall face it and overcome it. Each time we conquer an obstacle we have to feel that a new opportunity has dawned. Before we enter any difficulty, inner or outer, it appears insurmountable. The difficulty is like a mountain. It looks so high and we feel that we cannot climb it or go beyond it. Then afterwards, when we enter into the difficulty, we get tremendous inspiration — an inner push or inner urge. Then the difficulty is nothing; it is a passing phase, a cloud. We have entered into a cloud, but soon the sun will come out. It is only a matter of a few hours, and then the sun is bound to come to the fore. At that time we climb up and we reach our highest goal. Again, beyond our highest goal we see another mountain. Then we have another opportunity to realise our own reality. So in the morning the difficulty seems insurmountable. At noon the difficulty appears very easy to surmount, as easy as drinking water. By evening the difficulty has become an opportunity to enter into the highest and farthest Beyond.
If we feel that doubt has entered into our spiritual life or that we have some other difficulty, we will face it as an experience and try to illumine it. Then, the moment we transform it, this doubt becomes a solid foundation in our life of aspiration. If we accept and transform what comes our way instead of denying its existence, that very thing becomes ours. At first ignorance takes the side of ignorance and wisdom takes the side of wisdom. But the moment ignorance comes and attacks us, if we use our own wisdom to accept it, transform it, illumine it and make it our own, then its strength has become our own. Ignorance can again come and attack us, but now we have more power. The ignorance that we have transformed and illumined has become our friend; it is an added strength.
Whatever comes our way, we should grab and transform with our will-power. But if we try to deny the existence of these negative forces — fear, doubt and insecurity — they won’t leave us. If we do not accept these forces, if we deny their existence, then there comes a time in one of our unguarded moments when they show us what they are. Once a spiritual Master was asked by his disciple, “What can hostile forces do?” Immediately, he gave the names of three of his disciples. “It can take away the dearest disciples. Two of these disciples have been snatched away. The third had to die untimely. I could not protect him.”
So, if doubt comes, take it as an experience and then go beyond it. Transform it into something higher and more fulfilling. Then you will see that there is no problem. Those who have no doubt do not have to worry. But again, to condemn those who have doubt is a stupid, deplorable and unpardonable mistake. If I am lacking something, it is because God didn’t give it to me. Again, if God does give someone a particular obstacle, it is for a special purpose. So we have to know that God will take care of him and transform the difficulty in His own Way.
When we enter into God, we enter into Reality. Reality cannot have doubt. Reality itself is truth, so how can it permit doubt? But in the beginning, if we feel that doubt is entering into us, let us accept it and recognise its existence as a force to be transformed for our own benefit. First the mountain appears insurmountable; then it becomes so easy to climb up. Finally it becomes a genuine opportunity to enter into greater reality.From:Sri Chinmoy,The doubt-world, Agni Press, 1977
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