I am
My life'sGod-hunger-heart.
```Nothing is more important
Than my heart's sleepless cryFor God's Compassion-Eye,
His Protection-FeetAnd His Forgiveness-Heart.
```My Lord, my Lord, my Lord,
From today onI shall not cry anymore for Your attention;
No, not even for Your Compassion.I shall cry only for my perfection.
```My Lord, my Lord, my Lord,
I know that unless I satisfy YouIn Your own Way,
My own satisfaction will always remainA far cry.
```Each time my mind cherishes
A divine thought,God drops a Compassion-Drop
From His Fountain-Delight-Eye. ```No more shall I climb up
My hope-mountain-heights.From now on I shall live
Inside the heart of faith-fountainAnd inside the breath of promise-sky.
```I sail with perfection-oneness
And satisfaction-peaceOnly when I unconditionally love
My Lord Beloved Supreme. ```God has provided my mind
With a thousand exitsTo leave doubt-prison.
Alas, my mind simply does not wantTo avail itself
Of this golden opportunity. ```Spiritual awakening, spiritual feelings
And spiritual self-givingMust be natural and spontaneous
And can never be forced. ```The heart's love for God
And the mind's obedience to GodCan and must go together.
```My soul's promise
And my heart's satisfactionWalk, march and run together
Along the same roadTo reach the Heart of the Unknowable.
```Spirituality is not self-forgetfulness.
Spirituality is self-awareness.Spirituality is God-fulness.
```My Lord Beloved Supreme loves
Even my abysmal abyss Godless daysAnd my abysmal abyss Godless nights!
```O my tormented mind,
I am my lover-heart.Your days are numbered.
My protector-soulIs fast approaching my lover-heart.
```I always choose God's Needs
Over my needs.This is the only real way
To make myself and keep myself happy. ```I never want to count
My heart's aspiration-moments.I just want to multiply
My life's dedication-hours. ```My Lord Supreme,
May I always be foundBetween my prayer-life-beauty
And my aspiration-heart-fragrance. ```Ambition kills spirituality.
Aspiration not only revives spiritualityBut also energises and immortalises
Spirituality. ```My life's insecurity
And my heart's satisfactionAlways love to remain
Strangers to each other. ```May my prayer-heart-power
Silence every dayMy desire-mind-sound.
```I am so happy
That I now have the capacityTo compel my life to surrender
To my heart'sSecret and sacred God-hunger.
```God wants me to be the owner
Of God's Smile-Beauty-Heart.He does not want me to be the owner
Of my self-pity-tears. ```O seeker,
You want to know whatYour insecurity, jealousy and impurity
Have done to you?Your insecurity, jealousy and impurity
Have spread death-seedsIn your inner life of aspiration
And your outer life of dedication. ```I am divinely proud
Of my mindBecause it is sleeplessly obedient
To God.I am supremely proud
Of my heartBecause it is breathlessly grateful
To God. ```My mind thinks that nothing
Has to change.My heart feels that everything
Has to change.My soul knows that everything
Is already changed in the inner worldAnd now is in the process of being changed
In the outer world. ```I need God's Compassion only,
I need God's Affection only,I need God's Love only
To be really, divinelyAnd supremely fulfilled.
```Even the very thought of gratitude
Clears my mind,Purifies my heart
And satisfies my life. ```Every day
I keep my heart's door openTo impossibility's
Highest and brightest galaxies. ```My prayer-mind
Is my miracle-power.My meditation-heart
Is my satisfaction-tower. ```Each human life
Has only two supreme necessities:The God-foundation within
And the God-illumination without. ```Short, shorter and shortest
Is the span of my earthly fame.Long, longer and longest —
Nay, birthless and deathless —Is my soul's Heavenly God-oneness-game.
```While my soul is in this body,
I must learn the proper wayTo love God, serve God and fulfil God
Here on earth and there in Heaven. ```O my suspicious mind,
I shall not allow youTo destroy the most precious
Faith-fragrance of my heart. ```True love lives
Inside the life-garden.True devotion lives
Inside the heart-flower.True surrender lives
Inside the soul-fragrance. ```I am not self-indulgent
Only when I chooseGod's Compassion-Protection-Feet.
Otherwise,I am always self-indulgent.
```I want to be God's
Constant willingness-slave.God wants me to be
His sleepless, breathlessOneness and fulness-child.
```Every morning
My compassionate Lord SupremeTells me the same thing:
"My child, become an aspiration-growerAnd not an expectation-collector.
I shall give you everything that I haveAnd that I am
At My choice Hour." ```Who can reverse the course of my life-river
So that I may reach the Golden Shore?God the Compassion-Eye
AndGod the Forgiveness-Heart.
```One God-realisation-hero
Absolutely can challenge and destroyThe pride of the world-ignorance-army.
```I have definitely two goals:
My very short-term goal is self-giving.My very long-term goal is God-becoming.
```Birthless is the heart-beauty
Of my loveFor my Lord Beloved Supreme.
Deathless is the soul-fragranceOf my surrender
To my Lord Beloved Supreme. ```God loses faith in us
Only when our enthusiasm-mindAnd eagerness-heart
Deliberately start limping. ```When I was in the desire-world,
I was forced by the undivine forcesTo live in an abyss of nothingness.
Now that I am in the aspiration-world,The divine forces are helping me
Climb up my realisation-pinnacles. ```God laughs and laughs
When I doubt Him to my heart's content.God cries and swims in a sea of despair
When I cherish even an iota of doubtAbout myself.
```God loves me unconditionally
Not because I have a great mindAnd not because I have a good heart
But because, unlike human beings,He simply does not know
And does not want to knowHow to do anything else.
```It is never too late to seek newness.
It is never too late to achieve fulness.What we need are
The heart's eagerness-tearsAnd the mind's enthusiasm-smiles.
```May my faith-heart
Run faster than lightning speedTo arrive at my God-destination.
```God wants me to simplify
My life-story,God wants me to purify
My heart-breath,And God Himself wants to glorify
My soul-song. ```At least in my case,
I am absolutely sure thatMy endless fountain of creativity
Comes from only one SourceAnd that Source is
The unconditional Compassion-EyeOf my Beloved Supreme.
```Only my heart's streaming tears
Can and shall expediteMy Lord's Compassion-flooded Arrival.
```From:Sri Chinmoy,I am my life's God-hunger-heart, part 2, Agni Press, 1994
Sourced from https://srichinmoylibrary.com/ghh_2