God makes the decision for me in everything. This is called spirituality. Before sincere spirituality starts, we say, “I will do this, I will do that.” But once we enter into the field of spirituality, at that time our sincerity comes to the fore. When sincerity comes to the fore, we surrender. We say, “God, if you want me to write hundreds of books, or only two books, I am more than happy.”
In human life there is always a tug-of-war between desire and aspiration. We start with desire. Then, when we enter into aspiration, God gives us the fruits of our aspiration. He may even tease us. He said to me, “You wanted to be satisfied with only two hundred books! If you are going to pray to Me, if you are going to please Me in My own Way, then even the desire-life which you had once upon a time, in a very spiritual way I shall fulfil.”
God will fulfil our desires, but in His own Way. When we surrender to His Will through our prayers and meditations, we say, “I do not need the fulfilment of my desires. I only want to please You in Your own Way. Only give me the capacity to please You in Your own Way.” Then we see that He enters into our desire-world, which we want to bury in oblivion, and from that mud, clay and sand, He tries to bring out a diamond. That is why I say that, if we enter into the spiritual life, we do not lose any capacity.
If God gives us the divine capacity, then we go on, go on making progress. Even in our human capacity, which is so limited, God creates miracles. We start with desire-life. Then we come to learn that desire-life is nothing but hurdles and obstructions. But when we enter into the spiritual life, everything is unlimited, unlimited, unlimited.
2. 16 July 2005, Aspiration-Ground Jamaica, New York.↩
From:Sri Chinmoy,My golden children, Agni Press, 2013
Sourced from https://srichinmoylibrary.com/glc