Supreme!
My solemn promise:
I shall never standIn Your
Unworthy PresenceWith my
Sacred palms togetherIn supplication.
```Supreme!
You will
Never be ableTo break
A single smileOver my
Beautiful face. ```Supreme!
I am eagerly waiting
For someoneTo replace You,
So thatI can have someone
To swim with meWhile I swim
In the sea of tears,Frustrations
And failures. ```Supreme!
You want me
To sacrificeMy life to You.
Never!You do not value
My life,To say the least.
Therefore,I am buying a goat
For sacrificeTo satisfy You,
For I feelThe goat-sacrifice
Will be valuedBy You.
```Supreme!
How I wish
It would beA long-forgotten story
That I have touched Your Feet,Desired and cried
For anything. ```Supreme!
I call You
My own:A mistake
That defiesCorrection And
Redemption. ```Supreme!
True.
My desiresWere great
In number.But now
My frustrationsAre a million
Times more. ```Supreme!
I do not know how
You justifyYour Name:
"Eternity'sCompassion-Eye
AndImmortality's
Forgiveness-Heart." ```Supreme!
To me
The word 'compassion'Is not applicable
To You.I have
Luckily endedMy cherished,
Faulty dreams. ```Supreme!
Destruction I see
Within, without,All around.
You are untroubled,Unconcerned
And what not. ```Supreme!
When necessity demands,
Earthly parentsWarn their children.
I took YouAs my only Parents.
You deliberatelyDid not warn me.
It seems Your dictionaryDoes not house
The word 'warning'.Look at my fate:
Abysmal abyss-sorrowsHave befriended me.
```Supreme!
To worship You
Is to beIntimately familiar
With the sorrowsAnd pangs
Of my life-treeWith all its branches,
Flowers, leavesAnd fruits.
```Supreme!
Are You blind?
It seems You seeOnly when
I am frustratedAnd utterly lost
And I thrustMy anger-finger
In YourTwo uncomely Eyes.
```Supreme!
My sole desire
Was to becomeThe golden dust
Of Your Lotus-Feet.I am so happy
That it is not too lateTo withdraw
My desire totally. ```Supreme!
The less
I think of You,The more I am free
From theWorld-disease
Which YouUndoubtedly
And solely are. ```Supreme!
In those days,
The moment I touchedYour Feet,
Fears and doubtsDevoured me.
You may not believe —Fears, doubts, anxieties,
Worries, frustrations,Unbelief and disbelief
Devoured meAnd my life.
Alas, a deplorable,Despicable experience!
In vain, how hard I tryTo delete it
From the tabletOf my heart.
```Supreme!
Hard-hearted
You are.Stony,
In every senseOf the term,
You are.From You,
Nothing shall I get,Nothing do I desire.
I am self-contained,Self-sufficient.
Believe it or not,My self-perfection-life
Plus all-satisfaction-lifeIs blossoming
Faster than the fastest. ```Supreme!
I was
A slaveTo Your Service.
I am nowThe master
Of my will. ```Supreme!
I shall not give way
To sleep.My mind-tempest,
My heart-tornadoFrom now on
I shallSleeplessly treasure.
For they are real,Unlike all Your
Hollow Promises. ```Supreme!
If anybody asks me
How to pray to You,I shall tell him
Immediately,"Do not walk along
That way.Be not a fool.
Do not inviteThe sea of sorrows."
And I mean it! ```Supreme!
If anybody asks me
How to meditateOn You,
I shall tell himImmediately
To meditateOn frustration
Instead.It will definitely give
A satisfying result. ```Supreme!
I gave up everything
To please YouIn Your own Way —
Even the exquisiteBeauty
Of my heartAnd the incomparable
FragranceOf my soul.
```Supreme!
I am so glad
That YouHave defeated me
In forgetting me.Had it been
The reverse,The whole world
Would haveLooked down
On poor me. ```Supreme!
You always
Talk aboutProgress, progress.
Progress.How is it
That You haveNot even once
Said one nice wordOf appreciation
To meAbout my
Most astonishingRainbow-series
Of progress? ```Supreme!
Knowing fully well
That You would notWake deliberately,
I called and called.Now I do not mind
Even if You enjoyYour Eternity's
Tranquillity-floodedSleep.
```Supreme!
I had faith in You
For longer thanThe longest time.
I am neitherBegging You
Nor forcing YouTo change
The game.But, I assure You,
If You ever changeThe game,
You will not beDisappointed.
```Supreme!
Positions and possessions
I gave You.I do not have them.
I do not need them either.My new life
Is my new possession. ```Supreme!
I do not want
My caseTo be heard anymore.
I am now mightily freeFrom my supreme
Fascination-illusion-delusion-dilemmas.I am now in a world
Of a newly acquired life.I alone
Am my Eternity's all. ```Supreme!
Finally,
I am myVolcano-anger-eruption.
I like it.I love it.
I treasure it.I am, at once,
The dreamerAnd owner
Of a billion or trillionRainbow-dreams.
```Supreme!
There was a time
When Your NameWas my only hope.
Now, my only hopeIs that I can remain
A perfect strangerTo You
Throughout Eternity. ```Supreme!
I used to cry.
Weep and sobAt Your Feet.
But thoseMalignant diseases
Will never be ableTo attack me
Anymore. ```Supreme!
You may say
What I am sayingIs absolutely wrong.
You just tell meIf anything is right
In Your creation. ```Supreme!
I have emptied
The tear-oceansOf my heart.
I do not mind at allIf You do not
Come out ofYour dear, sweet
And self-amorousComatose sleep.
```Supreme!
You want
Your creationTo please You.
I do not knowHow You imagine
Your desireTo be fulfilled
As long as You keepYour creation
Not onlyUnconsciously,
But consciouslyWeak, helpless
And hopeless. ```Supreme!
To repeat
Your NameIs to welcome
Untold misfortunes.This is my
Infallible conviction. ```Supreme!
They say
That there areCountless
Undivine children,But no
Undivine parents.Alas, how I wish
It could be trueIn Your case.
```Supreme!
If You continue
To behave like this,Then for God's sake,
Do not takeUpon Yourself
The name of theCompassion-flooded
World-Pilot. ```Supreme!
To worship You
Is to multiplyOne's self-doubts.
```Supreme!
The whole world
Understands me,My poor heart.
Either You do not knowHow to understand me
Or You purposelyDo not care.
```Supreme!
My hopes
Never thought thatThey would find
Their fulfilmentElsewhere.
```Supreme!
I fed You
With my heart'sNectar-devotion.
I want the worldTo continue
To have faith in You.Therefore,
I am not tellingThe world
What You areFeeding me with.
```Supreme!
Both of us knew
Something special:I knew
How to pray.You knew
How to spurn. ```Supreme!
I begged You
For protection.I never thought
That You did notEven know
The meaningOf protection.
```Supreme!
I clasped Your Feet
Most devotedly.Alas, it was
My delusion-mindThat compelled me
To do so. ```Supreme!
Happiness I sought
At Your Feet.But what have I found
And become?A tear-stained face.
```Supreme!
Openly,
You tell the doctorsTo heal the patient.
Secretly,You tell death
To kill the patient.Since the beginning
Of Your creation,You have been
Playing this game. ```Supreme!
I desired to become
The dustOf Your Feet.
I now have becomeMy greatest victory's
Tallest banner. ```Supreme!
Do You have
The capacityTo forgive me?
I do not thinkYou have.
```Supreme!
Do You want me
To forgive You?For God's sake,
I do not needAnd I do not want
To haveThat capacity.
```Supreme!
It does not matter
Whether You cameTo me
Or I cameTo You.
We are nowThe North Pole
And the South Pole.This is what
Definitely matters. ```From:Sri Chinmoy,Sadness-heart-silence. Madness-mind-eloquence, Agni Press, 1998
Sourced from https://srichinmoylibrary.com/shm