Question: Guru, when you want to express the divine music of the Beyond, do you feel that the instruments that you play — such as esraj and flute — convey properly what you want to convey?
Sri Chinmoy: No, they do not. Sometimes when I am playing my old songs, the tune is extremely soulful, but inside the soulful songs there is another melody which I am hearing — an inner melody which is infinitely sweeter, clearer and more beautiful. But I am unable to bring it out on the esraj. Sometimes I am playing so well, but inside the tune that I am playing, I am hearing the same tune in an infinitely sweeter and infinitely more delicate form which the instrument I am playing cannot express.
Sometimes my voice also does not convey what I want to convey. I can easily open the chakras at my sweet will — especially the throat centre, from where the good singing voice comes. But even then, my voice may not express what I hear within. This is because the body is limited. No matter how much spiritual power you have, or what kind of genius you are, the body is all limitation. Sometimes I sing so soulfully; my body, vital and mind are all pleased, and the people who are listening are feeling that it is extremely soulful. But I feel miserable that I am unable to offer the music that I am hearing from within. It does not come absolutely correctly.
From:Sri Chinmoy,Truth's fountain-melody, Agni Press, 1992
Sourced from https://srichinmoylibrary.com/tfm