My inferiority

Inferiority, my inferiority!
Do you not realise
That you are hurting
My beautiful eyes?
How can I forgive you
And why should I?

Inferiority, my inferiority!
Do you not realise
That you are killing
My soulful heart?
How can I forgive you
And why should I?

Inferiority, my inferiority!
Do you not realise
That you are disappointing
My hopeful soul?
How can I forgive you
And why should I?

Inferiority, my inferiority!
Do you not realise
That you are deserting
My blessingful Supreme?
How can I forgive you
And why should I?

My aspiration is my preparation

My aspiration is my preparation.
My dedication is my preparation.
My preparation is for my emptiness.
My preparation is for my fulness.
My emptiness is my readiness.
My fulness is my readiness.
My emptiness-readiness pleases
God the Compassion-Giver.
My fulness-readiness pleases
God the Perfection-Proclaimer.

I love my Beloved Supreme

I love my body.
Therefore, I am patrolling its boundaries
Carefully.

I love my vital.
Therefore, I am controlling its aggressions
Forcefully.

I love my mind.
Therefore, I am challenging its doubts
Dauntlessly.

I love my heart.
Therefore, I am changing its needs
Wisely.

I love my soul.
Therefore, I am flying with it
Devotedly.

I love my Beloved Supreme.
Therefore, I am crying for Him
Sleeplessly, unreservedly
And unconditionally.

My determination

Determination, my determination!
You are divinely great inside my mind.
You are supremely good inside my heart.
You bring me measureless riches
From the helpless poverty
Of hopeless frustrations.
You smash impossibility's Everest-pride
    For me.
You show me tomorrow's far-distant God
In the tearing immediacy of today.

O my life's Beloved Supreme

O my mind's dear Supreme,
You like me not because I am great;
I am great because You like me.

O my heart's sweet Supreme,
You love me not because I am good;
I am good because You love me.

O my life's Beloved Supreme,
You want me
Not because I am always satisfied;
I am always satisfied
Because You want me.

Discipline

Discipline, discipline, discipline,
Discipline!
Discipline is my faithfulness
To my struggling body.
Discipline is my faithfulness
To my dynamic vital.
Discipline is my faithfulness
To my searching mind.
Discipline is my faithfulness
To my crying heart.
Discipline is my faithfulness
To my dreaming soul.
Discipline is my faithfulness
To my loving, blessing and fulfilling Lord
Supreme.

My discipline is an opportunity-seed.
My discipline is a preparation-plant.
My discipline is a manifestation-tree.

When my entire life becomes
A discipline-boat,
My Lord comes to me and says:
"My child, I am your Perfection-Boatman
And I will be sailing you
To My Satisfaction-Shore."

Two special names

My Lord Supreme, this is a special day — Gratitude Day. Alas, I do not have even an iota of gratitude to offer You. Since I have no gratitude, please tell me what I can offer You instead.

"My child, then give Me a soulful promise."

My Lord Supreme, I do not know what a soulful promise is. I promise in season and out of season, but never do I fulfil my promises. Such being the case, my Lord Supreme, please tell me what I can offer You instead of a soulful promise.

"My child, then tell Me that you will love Me divinely."

My Lord Supreme, I do not know what divine Love is. How can I offer You divine Love when I do not know what divine Love feels like?

"My child, then give Me a fruitful cry. Cry for Me once, only once in your life."

Alas, my Lord Supreme, I do not cry even for myself. How do You expect me to cry for You?

"My child, let me tell you one thing. Each of us deserves a special name. Each of us will have a new name. Your new name will be a secret and clever unwillingness. My new name will be an unreservedly open and compassionately stupid Forgiveness."

I wanted to bind You

My sweet Supreme, I wanted to bind Your Power with my desire-life. I failed.

My sweet Supreme, I wanted to bind Your Peace with my aspiration-life. I failed.

My sweet Supreme, I wanted to bind Your Bliss with my dedication-life. I failed.

My sweet, sweeter and sweetest Supreme, I wanted to bind Your Love with my surrender-life. I failed.

Please tell me why I failed each and every time. Why, my sweet, sweeter and sweetest Supreme?

"My sweet child, my sweeter child, my sweetest child, you failed because you wanted to bind My possessions. You will succeed only if you bind Me and not My possessions."

My sweet, sweeter and sweetest Lord Supreme, then tell me what You are.

"My sweet child, my sweeter child, my sweetest child, I am My Infinity's Compassion for you. I am My Eternity's Concern for you and I am My Immortality's Love for you.

"If you can bind Me, then automatically you will be able to bind My possessions as well. But if you try to bind My possessions, you will never succeed and, at the same time, I shall always remain far, far, far, infinitely far away from you.

"Possess Me, claim Me and own Me with your oneness-light and oneness-height. Lo and behold, all My possessions will immediately become all yours."

What can I do?

What can I do?
I can think of
My Lord's constant Forgiveness
In my life.

What else can I do?
I can feel
My Lord's constant Love
Inside my heart.

What can I see?
I can see every morning
A beautiful sunrise
Upon my eyes.

What else can I see?
I can see every evening
A moonlit night
Upon my head.

What can I give and receive?
I can give
My ant-tiny gratitude
To my Lord Supreme
And receive from Him
His Himalayan-high Satisfaction.

Left to myself

Left to myself,
I would once more become
A perfect slave
To my desiring life.

Left to myself,
I would once more become
A good friend
Of my sleeping body.

Left to myself,
I would once more deeply appreciate
My attacking vital.

Left to myself,
I would once more become
An ardent admirer
Of my doubting mind.

Left to myself,
I would once more helplessly cry
With my weeping heart.

Left to myself,
I would once more deliberately ignore
My illumining soul.

Left to myself,
I would once more remain away,
Far away,
From the ever-blessing Hands
Of my Beloved Supreme.

But oh, I cannot do that.
I shall not do that.
I shall always remain
In the Heart of my Beloved Supreme.
I shall always remain
At the Feet of my Beloved Supreme.
I shall always remain with the Vision
Of my Beloved Supreme.
I shall always remain for the Manifestation
Of my Beloved Supreme.
Him to please in His own Way,
I shall become
An ever-climbing tree;
I shall become
An ever-inspiring flower;
And I shall become
An ever-nourishing fruit.

Ambition, my friend unparalleled

Ambition, my friend unparalleled,
You are helping my body
To come out of lethargy-night.

Ambition, my friend unparalleled,
You are helping my vital
To smash asunder
The heavy and binding shackles
Of frustration-slavery.

Ambition, my friend unparalleled,
You are helping my mind
To free its luminous vision
From the prison of teeming doubts.

Ambition, my friend unparalleled,
You are helping my heart
To free its marvellous peace
From the cave of torturing insecurity.

Ambition, my friend unparalleled,
You are helping my soul
To dream in and through me
Clearly, swiftly, powerfully
And triumphantly.

Ambition, my friend unparalleled,
You are serving my Beloved Supreme
To make me a perfect instrument of His,
Cheerfully, sleeplessly
And unreservedly.

Ambition, my friend unparalleled,
When I use you divinely,
I create not only a satisfaction-world
Within me,
But also a promise-world outside me;
I create a new dawn for myself
And a challenging and fulfilling reality
For the whole world.

Ambition, my friend unparalleled,
When I use you undivinely,
I destroy my inner world
That wants to grow and glow,
And I also destroy my outer world
That wants to ascend and transcend.

Ambition, my friend unparalleled,
I shall always use you in a divine way
So that at every moment
You can be proud of
My sincerity,
My dedication
    And
My transformation.

What is a miracle?

What is a miracle? A miracle is an unusual incident. A miracle is either an illumining or an exciting experience. A miracle is either a happy smile or an unhappy cry of nature.

I am a seeker. I am a God-lover. I pray and meditate every day. That means I have chosen God to be my eternal Pilot, and God has chosen me to be eternally His own. That means I am part and parcel of divinity. Such being the case, how is it possible for me to become jealous? How is it possible for me to become insecure? How is it possible for me to become impure? To become jealous, insecure or impure — is this not an unhappy miracle, a deplorable miracle, that I perform every day?

I am an insignificant human being. For years and years I have cherished my friendship with teeming doubts. But now I have a new friend: a blossoming faith. For me to transform my life of doubt into a life of faith — is this not a miracle, a happy miracle?

Desire-life was my favourite reality. But now aspiration-life has become my favourite reality, my only reality. Is this not a miracle?

I am not even six feet tall. Yet I am praying to the Absolute Supreme to reach His infinite Height, which is far beyond even my imagination's flight. For me to long to grow into that Height — is this not a miracle?

I am mortal. My thoughts, my deeds, my experiences — everything that I have and everything that I am — represent mortality. Yet despite everything that I have and everything that I am, I am longing for Immortality. Is this not a miracle?

If I enter into friendship with ignorance, if I become a friend of jealousy, meanness, insecurity and impurity, then I must feel that I am performing deplorable miracles day in and day out.

Again, when I feel one with humanity, when I think of vastness, luminosity, oneness and God-Satisfaction in God's own Way, then at that time also I am performing miracles, supreme miracles.

It is up to me whether to play the role of an ignorant weakling or an all-knowing God-man, whether to perform deplorable miracles or divine miracles.

If I unreservedly and unconditionally love my Beloved Supreme, if I soulfully cry to realise Him, then there can be no greater miracle. As an unaspiring human being, I care for humanity's appreciation and admiration. But if I change my desire-life into aspiration-life and cry only for God — to please Him in His own Way, to manifest Him in His own Way sleeplessly — then in God's Eye I am the supremely chosen miracle-performer.

I shall no longer allow

Body, my stupid body,
I shall no longer allow you
To have an inordinate hunger.

Vital, my shameless vital,
I shall no longer allow you
To have an insatiable thirst.

Mind, my clever mind,
I shall no longer allow myself
To fall under the sweep of your arguments.

Heart, my hopeless heart,
I shall no longer allow you
To remain timidity incarnate.

Soul, my former friend,
I shall no longer allow you
To remain indifferent towards me.

God, my bountiful God,
I shall no longer allow myself
To remain unconscious
Of Your Compassion-Sky.

Superiority

Superiority, my superiority, why are you so cruel to me? Why do you make me always sad and mad? Do you not realise that because of you, at every moment I am assailed by the fear that someone is going to dethrone me and take away my crown?

Why do I have to be always in the world of darkening, threatening and killing fear? I want joy at every moment, and this joy I can never get from you. The fleeting joy that I get from sitting an inch higher than the rest of the world disappears when I see the arrows of jealousy, meanness, anger and frustration that others hurl at me. The joy I get by becoming a little bit superior to others is insignificant in comparison to the suffering I then go through. I need abiding happiness, and this happiness I can never get from you, O superiority.

I do not need and I do not want inferiority, either. Inferiority always kills me with sorrow, despondency, fear, doubt and meanness. In the battlefield of life inferiority sometimes gives way and surrenders helplessly to superiority, thinking that it is a hopeless case to fight against it any more. Willingly or unwillingly inferiority serves superiority. Inferiority unconsciously wants to remain where it is, while superiority never, never wants to come down to the level of inferiority or allow inferiority to be on the same footing. Superiority fights until the last moment to maintain its supremacy. It never wants to give up its pedestal.

O superiority, I do not need you and I do not want you. O inferiority, I do not need you and I do not want you. O equality, I need you and I want you desperately and sleeplessly. I will need you until the divine Hour dawns when I know consciously what God's Will is. Once I know precisely what God's Will is and once I can cheerfully and unconditionally execute God's Will, then in my life of aspiration and dedication there can be no such thing as superiority or inferiority. When I am all oneness with the universal and transcendental Will of my Beloved Supreme, happiness will reign supreme in my heart of aspiration and in my life of dedication.

O superiority, O inferiority, if I stay with you, far will I have to go. And even at the end of my journey, I will see that I have not gone anywhere, for with superiority and inferiority I have no real goal. But if I start with equality, there shall come a time when God's Oneness-Reality will come and lead me, guide me and take me to my destined goal. It is from equality that I will enter into God's Oneness-Reality, and there I will have constant peace, constant satisfaction and constant love for the poor earth and the rich Heaven.

My advice to my Beloved Supreme

My dear Supreme, my sweet Supreme, my Beloved Supreme, I talk too much, too much, too much. My Eternity's Supreme, how is it and why is it that You do not change my nature? How and why?

Not only do I talk too much; what is worse, I literally die for a listening ear. And as if that were not enough, I also want to give advice to each and every soul on earth, with no exception.

When I give advice, I expect appreciation and admiration from everybody. I expect everybody to extol me to the skies. Alas, nobody pays any heed to my advice. Nobody needs or appreciates my advice. Yet I go on talking and talking, giving advice to each and every human being on earth.

I also advise the members of my earthly existence — my body, vital, mind and heart. But they do not listen to me either. I even advise my soul. I advise my soul-bird not to leave this beautiful cage called the body, for if it leaves this cage, then I shall die. I want to be immortal. I want to remain on earth forever and forever.

I even dare to advise You, my Beloved Supreme. Lord, O my Eternity's Lord Supreme, I know You have many names, whereas I have but one name. Since it is not fair for You to have many names while I have only one, I beg of You to have only one name. If You cannot agree to my proposal, if You do not listen to my advice, then please have only two names. More than two names I do not want You to have, especially for me. Your two names will be Compassion-Sun and Forgiveness-Ocean. When I need compassion, I shall call You Compassion-Sun. When I need forgiveness, I shall call You Forgiveness-Ocean. These are the two names I would like You to have from now on. All Your other names will no longer be used by me.

O my dear Supreme, O my Lord Supreme, I have advised You time and again. Now is the time for me to beg You to grant me a most special boon. I do not want to remain an idle talker any more. I wish to become an active doer. Finally, I would like to become a selfless lover. Then I shall love You with my self-giving heart, with my self-giving life and with my self-giving oneness-existence.

Indifference

Indifference reigns supreme in my life.

My body is indifferent to the dynamic urge of my vital. My vital is indifferent to the well-earned rest of my body.

My mind is indifferent to the soulful cry of my heart. My heart is indifferent to the inquisitive quest of my mind.

My soul is indifferent to the slow efforts, slower success and even slower progress of my life.

Even my Beloved Supreme, it seems, is indifferent to my supreme realisation. Had He flooded my entire being with His Concern supreme, I am sure I would not have been waiting for millennia for my realisation.

Alas, alas, O my Beloved Supreme, do tell me why You are indifferent to me, and why the rest of the members of my family are indifferent to one another.

"My sweet child, I am not indifferent to you. Dive deep within and you will see that constant Concern is My only name.

"And about your body, vital, mind, heart and soul, I wish to tell you that they can be freed from the fatal disease of indifference only by using the medicine oneness-concern. When oneness-concern plays its role within and without, satisfaction at every moment shall loom large in your life. At that time the indifference-blow will be found nowhere. Only the oneness-flow will be found all-where."

Dear brother, sweet sister

January, my dear brother January,
Please give me an inspiration-flower.

February, my sweet sister February,
Please give me an aspiration-flame.

March, my dear brother March,
Please give me a determination-bull.

April, my sweet sister April,
Please give me a luminosity-mind.

May, my sweet sister May,
Please give me a purity-heart.

June, my dear brother June,
Please give me an ever-new
Concentration-arrow.

July, my sweet sister July,
Please give me a deer-speed.

August, my dear brother August,
Please give me a meditation-mountain.

September, my sweet sister September,
Please give me a surrender-lamb.

October, my sweet sister October,
Please give me a sacrifice-horse.

November, my sweet sister November,
Please give me the realisation-sun.

December, my dear brother December,
Please give me my Lion-Lord's
Satisfaction-roar.

Ambition

Ambition, my precious ambition, it is you who untiringly help me to transcend my capacities.

It is you who help me to transform my inordinate pride into sacred humility.

The seeker-heart in me, with your help, can sing the song of universal oneness.

Nobody else but you alone can make three most rare, sleepless efforts. By virtue of your sleepless efforts, you pull God the Compassion down, you push man the aspiration up and every day you inspire and energise my seeker-heart.

Ambition, my precious ambition, your victory-palace is my Lord's and my meeting place.

You have peace

You have peace.
That means you have wisdom.
You have wisdom.
That means you have love.
You have love.
That means you have concern.
You have concern.
That means you have dedication.
You have dedication.
That means you have aspiration.
You have aspiration.
That means you have
The living God within you.
You have the living God within you.
That means you know constantly
Who you are.
You know constantly who you are.
That means you know that you are at once
Humanity's eternal cry
    And
Divinity's eternal Smile.

I shall learn and learn

I shall learn and learn
Until I have awakened my body fully.

I shall learn and learn
Until I have disciplined my vital
Unreservedly.

I shall learn and learn
Until I have mastered my mind
Unmistakably.

I shall learn and learn
Until I have fed my heart
Satisfactorily.

I shall learn and learn
Until I have seen my soul smiling at me
Powerfully.

I shall learn and learn
Until I have heard my Beloved Supreme
Calling me His chosen child
Compassionately.

What is needed

What is needed
Is the conquest of self-indulgence.

What is needed
Is the conquest of self-importance.

What is needed
Is the conquest of self-doubt.

What is needed
For God's Compassion
Is a prayerful life.

What is needed
For God's Love
Is a soulful heart.

What is needed
For God's Forgiveness
Is a fruitful surrender.

What is needed
Is the supreme wisdom:
God comes first always,
    And
God for God's sake.

God the Creator

I do not deny the fact that
God the Creator
And God the Creation are one.
But if I have to make a choice
Between God the Creator
And God the Creation,
Then I shall always choose
God the Creator, God the Creator,
God the Creator.
This is my personal choice
And this will always remain
My personal choice,
For God the Creator
Preceded God the Creation.
I wish to be always
With the Source,
In the Source
And for the Source.

Hope

Hope,
My most precious friend,
My most sacred friend,
My most soulful friend
    And
My most dependable friend,
Only because of you
I can live on earth.
Only because of you
I dare to believe
That someday I will be able
To see my Beloved Supreme personally.
Only because of you
I dare to believe
That there shall come a time
When humanity's face and fate
Will be totally changed.
Only because of you
I feel that there shall come a time
When the animal in man
Will be transformed,
The human in man will be perfected
    And
The divine in man will be fulfilled.
Hope,
My Eternity's unparalleled friend,
Both God and I treasure you,
For both of us need you at every moment.
I need you to realise
My Beloved Supreme.
My Beloved Supreme needs you
To manifest Him here on earth.

Independence

Independence, independence, independence!

The human in me thinks that it is dependent on the persons it agrees with. It thinks that it loses its independence as soon as it sees eye to eye with others.

The divine in me thinks otherwise. It thinks that when it agrees with others, it enlarges its vision and establishes firmly its oneness with the rest of the world.

The human in me feels that it loses its independence the moment it takes something from others or even expects something from others.

The divine in me feels otherwise. The divine in me feels that God's creation is for give and take. Give what you have and take what you need, for there is only one common Source, and that Source is God. This moment God is playing the role of the Giver through me, and the next moment He is playing the role of the Receiver through me. It is all oneness-game.

The human in me thinks that it loses its independence as soon as it starts thinking of others, whether they are good or bad. It feels the supreme necessity of thinking only of itself and not of anybody or anything else, because it feels that nothing belongs to it.

The divine in me feels otherwise. The divine in me thinks, feels and knows that the moment it thinks of God, it creates a thought-world that is the precursor of an action-world. Once we have established a reality in the thought-world, then the next step is to bring that reality into the action-world for manifestation. In our action-life only can we have true satisfaction.

The divine in me knows that there is and there can be no such thing as independence. It is all dependence, and inside dependence what looms large is the message of constant oneness. God gives us what He has — His Compassion. We give God what we have — our love. God gives us what He is — His Goodness. We give God what we truly are — our aspiration to become greater.

We depend on God for His Compassion. God depends on us for His Manifestation. This kind of dependence is actually mutual oneness playing different roles at different times, for constant satisfaction and constant perfection, for constant perfection and constant satisfaction.

Grievances

Alas, alas, alas!
Grievances reign supreme in my life.
I have a grievance
Against my ignorance-night.
I have a grievance
Against my darkness-depth.
I have a grievance
Against my illusion-life.
I have a grievance
Against my frustration-body.
I have a grievance
Against my aggression-vital.
I have a grievance
Against my confusion-mind.
I have a grievance
Against my hesitation-heart.
I have a grievance
Against the idleness-promises
Of my soul.
I have a grievance
Against the fruitlessness-dreams
Of my Beloved Supreme.

Alas, alas, alas!
O my Beloved Supreme,
Do tell me how I can free myself
From the tyranny of grievances.
"My child,
You can free yourself
From the tyranny of grievances
If you can once and for all feel
That we all love you —
Your body, vital, mind, heart, soul
And I love you.
It is your feeling of conscious oneness
With us
That can easily free you
From your teeming grievances against us.
Try, My child, try;
You will succeed.
Yours will be the abiding peace,
Illumining light,
Nourishing delight
    And
Fulfilling satisfaction."

Why am I so unhappy?

My Supreme Lord,
Why am I so unhappy?

"My child,
You are unhappy because
Your body is afraid of everything.
You are unhappy because
Your vital complains about everything.
You are unhappy because
Your mind wants everything
To be explained.
You are unhappy because
Your heart does not trust anything."

My Supreme Lord,
How can I be happy?

"My child,
You can be happy easily,
Effectively and permanently
If you can think and feel
That you are of
The transcendentally beautiful Reality,
God,
And that you are for
The universally fruitful Reality, God."

Because you are a born-heart

Because you are a born-heart, My child,
I tell you for sure,
No, not even the greatest doubter
Can blight you.

Because you are a child-heart, My child,
I tell you for sure,
No, not even the worst possible rogue
Can spoil you.

Because you are a oneness-heart, My child,
I tell you for sure,
No, not even the most powerful
Hostile force
Can divide you.

A born-heart, a child-heart
And a oneness-heart
Are unparalleled treasures
Here on earth.

My Lord Supreme's most powerful weapon

There was a time when my Lord Supreme
Came to me with His Forgiveness
In infinite measure.
Alas, soon He came to realise
That I did not deserve His Forgiveness.
Therefore, He was compelled to withdraw
His Forgiveness.

There was a time when my Lord Supreme
Came to me with His Compassion
In infinite measure.
Alas, soon He came to realise
That I did not deserve His Compassion.
Therefore, He was compelled to withdraw
His Compassion.

There was a time when my Lord Supreme
Came to me with His Tolerance
In infinite measure.
Alas, soon He came to realise
That I did not deserve His Tolerance.
Therefore, He was compelled to withdraw
His Tolerance.

Now my Lord Supreme says to me,
"O useless seeker,
From now on I shall come to you
With My Justice-Light,
Which is, indeed, another way
Of expressing My Concern for you.

"But if you fail even this time,
Then I am going to use
My most powerful weapon:
My Indifference.
Of all My weapons,
My Indifference is by far
The most destructive.
Be careful, be careful, be careful,
O useless seeker!"

Happiness

Happiness, happiness!
My dear friend, happiness,
My unparalleled friend, happiness!
You help me to defy death's existence.
You help me to purify sorrow's presence.
You help me to strengthen my weakness.
You help me to enlighten my strength.
You help me to see the face
Of promise-dawn.
You help me to feel the heart
Of satisfaction-moon.
You help me to lead
The human in me.
You help me to feed
The divine in me.
You help me to fulfil
The Supreme in me.
My Eternity's friend, happiness,
You were, you are
And you shall forever remain
My Eternity's only true friend.

What do I need?

The stone existence in me
Needs more awareness.

The plant existence in me
Needs more confidence.

The animal existence in me
Needs more compassion.

The human existence in me
Needs more forgiveness-capacity.

The divine existence in me
Needs more aspiration-beauty.

The supreme Existence in me
Needs more satisfaction-delight.

And what do I need?
I need the fragrance of surrender-life.

If and when I do not love you soulfully

My Supreme Lord,
If and when I do not love You soulfully,
Do punish me.
Punish me mercilessly.

If and when I start loving You soulfully,
Do teach me
How to love You unconditionally.

My Supreme Lord,
If and when I do not love myself divinely,
Do punish me.
Punish me ruthlessly.

If and when I start loving myself divinely,
Do teach me
How to love myself sleeplessly
Inside the very depths
Of Your Compassion-Eye
    And
Your Forgiveness-Heart.

I have immediate solutions

My seeker friends,
You are telling me
That you have immediate problems.

I wish to tell you
That I have immediate solutions.

My solutions are very simple and direct.

Just come with me and sit
At my Lord's Forgiveness-Feet.

Just come with me and look
At my Lord's Compassion-Eyes.

Just come with me and swim
In the sea of my Lord's
Satisfaction-Heart.

Lo and behold, all your problems
Have totally vanished,
Forever and forever.

Editor's note

The inspirational messages in this book were offered by Sri Chinmoy after morning meditations during the Fall of 1980.

My inferiority, 15 September 1980 My aspiration is my preparation, 16 September 1980 I love my beloved Supreme, 17 September 1980 My determination, 18 September 1980 O my life's beloved Supreme, 19 September 1980 Discipline, 20 September 1980 Two special names, 22 September 1980 I wanted to bind You, 23 September 1980 What can I do?, 24 September 1980 Left to myself, 25 September 1980 Ambition, my friend unparalleled, 26 September 1980 What is a miracle?, 27 September 1980 I shall no longer allow, 27 September 1980 Superiority, 28 September 1980 My advice to my beloved Supreme, 29 September 1980 Indifference, 30 September 1980 Dear brother, sweet sister, 2 October 1980 Ambition, 2 October 1980 You have peace, 3 October 1980 I shall learn and learn, 4 October 1980 What is needed, 5 October 1980 God the Creator, 5 October 1980 Hope, 6 October 1980 Independence, 7 October 1980 Grievances, 8 October 1980 Why am I so unhappy?, 9 October 1980 Because you are a born-heart, 10 October 1980 My Lord Supreme's most powerful weapon, 21 October 1980 Happiness, 23 October 1980 What do I need?, 24 October 1980 If and when I do not love you soulfully, 25 October 1980 I have immediate solutions, 3 November 1980