My bicep goal reached¹

From 13½ inch biceps at long last I have come to 15 inches. I hope you people can see it.

I may not have giant muscles, but I do have greed. Today I did more than 100 repetitions with 400 pounds alternating my right and left arms. I am doing them so fast. It is like a jackhammer.

Unfortunately, since I came back from India a few days ago, my tiredness is killing me. A long journey definitely weakens the muscles.

An invitation for ideas²

I am inviting all the disciples to submit peculiar, funny, and charming ideas for things I can do on November 17th which is my 14th weightlifting anniversary. Once again we shall be doing these things for the public.

All my daily lifts I will do up to the maximum so that the guests can see my progress, plus I want to show some new things. In the old days, I lifted pumpkins and all that. If you can come up with new ideas, I will be very happy.

Unmilan's birthday celebration³

Today, on Unmilan’s birthday, we started our long-cherished-dream contest. A few days ago I lifted up 90 pounds from the ground. So Agraha took my weight and age into consideration and he has made a chart that tells what each one of the guards has to lift to make it equivalent. Savyasachi is the luckiest. He only has to do 106 pounds, but poor Prabhakar has to do 184.

From the ground these boys had to bring the weight up over their shoulder. For three seconds they had to keep it in the air and then they had to bring it down carefully. They were not allowed to drop it. We started with Savyasachi who is by far the strongest and by far the best featherweight. He took a three-second rest on his shoulder, but then he was able to lift it into the air. He is the only one who succeeded.

When it came to Pulak, instead of Pulak Viscardi, I said “Pulak Discardi” — because he was so weak. Kailash did very well. He had 127 pounds and he was able to bring it to the top of his head. Ashrita, Udar, Durdam, Bishwas, Bipin and Prabhakar also did well, but they could not hold it up in the air for three seconds. Now people see how difficult this lift is.

Darkness descends⁴

When I was about to lift 270 pounds in each arm for the second time this morning, all of a sudden the light went off. My exercise room became all dark. Then, after four or five minutes, the light came back on, but I forgot to turn on the video machine again to do my lift. It was my highest lift, but because I did not turn the machine back on when darkness disappeared, nothing came out. Alas, alas!

Not in the mood⁵

I was not at all in the mood to lift today after sitting for hours and hours and hours at the functions. Plus I have been gaining weight. Today I ate only fruit for breakfast.

Serious dieting⁶

Today is the fifth day of my diet. I have lost 5½ pounds. I do hope I can continue.

Self-doubts and world-criticism⁷

Today in one of my weightlifting prayers I spoke about triumphing over self-doubts and world-criticism. I was about to do the clean and press and I was planning to try 50 pounds in each arm. So self-doubt was coming, “Will it go up?”

Then there was a plane passing very low over my house and making so much noise. That noise was disturbing my concentration. So this was the world-criticism. Instead of criticising the plane, I triumphed over it, and I was able to lift 50 pounds with both arms and do 63 presses once the dumbbells were in the air.

If I can lift up 70 pounds from the ground with each arm simultaneously then I will feel really strong.

High, higher, highest!⁸

Today I am so happy with my lifting. I did 270 pounds in each arm three times. The first lift was huge; the second was unbelievable and the third was the high, higher, highest ever! You will see, in two or three days it will go half an inch higher!

Not on speaking terms⁹

This morning, after so many months, I lifted 300 pounds in each arm simultaneously. Can you imagine — 600 pounds is talking! For months and months, 600 and I were not on speaking terms. What was I doing? This proves there is such a thing as God’s Hour. We have to have patience. At what point God will give us the wisdom to go forward, we do not know. Now my dumbbells are one inch further apart. That one inch has made so much difference.

Sunday is usually my rest day. This is how I am taking rest!

Back on the scales¹⁰

Poor me! I am gaining weight on this particular diet. Today I am 175 pounds. I do not know how long I can continue with it. Daily if I am not on the scale five times I am not satisfied. But the scales are only giving me sad news.

A gentlemanly method¹¹

Today I did the clean and press with 96 pounds in one arm. Look and cry! First I lifted it up with my right hand, using the left hand to assist it. Then I pumped the dumbbell 18 times. Finally, in a very gentlemanly way I put it down on the carpet again.

My grip has really improved to hold this much weight in one hand.

The frightening weight¹²

I was so happy to lift up 300 pounds in each arm again today. I did it three times and the last lift was very good. Believe me, this weight really frightens me. When you see 600 pounds overhead, your heart starts palpitating!

My day of misery¹³

Since last night I have had a cramp in my right side in the region of my waist and it is still there. First I tried to use my seated calf machine, but it was out of order. The force that I was applying was exactly the same force that I used to use every time, but today 900 pounds and 1,000 pounds were failures. I feel that one of the plates has slipped somehow.

Then I tried to lift 200 pounds in each arm simultaneously. I was so disgusted with my first attempt. The dumbbells did not move, they did not talk even. Today is my day of misery.

Sick of weightlifting¹⁴

Today how I cried at Victory Field! I went to our Masters Games for a short time. There I tried to walk one lap. Each time, after only forty or fifty metres, I had to stop. It took me so long to cover 400 metres.

I am really sick of weightlifting. I am seriously thinking of stopping after November 17th. I want to walk outside again in the fresh air with nature. This gives me so much joy.

During these last twelve months with my weightlifting I reached a very high level. Now I want to concentrate on other things. I really would like to do walking. For me, there is no comparison between walking and weightlifting. When I walk outside in the fresh air, there is such newness and happiness. In the morning I do not like to spend two hours lifting these heavy weights. It is too much pressure. Weightlifting is the thing that I hated from the bottom of my heart from my Indian days. To lift up 600 pounds is not an easy task. Every day I face pain.

In the battlefield¹⁵

Today I had so much pain in my left knee in addition to the stiffness of my body. But when you are in the battlefield, you cannot disappear. Even if your shield has gone, you have to fight.

Whose body is perfect? Nobody can say that his health is perfect — nobody! In my case, I am dragging my left leg because of my knee problem. Then the other day, while trying to lift 2,000 pounds in the standing calf raise, such a sudden, sharp pain I got on the left side of my buttock.

Now it is only two weeks to my weightlifting performance at York College. I have to be very careful. Perhaps God wants me to take rest!

Reinstating the 400 pounds¹⁶

I was planning to drop my 400-pound lift with one arm from my weightlifting performance on the 17th. But today I have added it back into the programme. I feel sorry for 400. If I do not do it, my 400 pounds will cry.

After the weightlifting performance¹⁷

Last night’s weightlifting performance went extremely well. It lasted for so many hours. When I came home, my body was aching all over. I could not go upstairs except by crawling. This morning I did not come down until half past twelve. I am unable to walk still. The disciples place a chair in front of me and I lean on it to take a step. Then they move the chair and I take another step. Tonight at midnight we are leaving for Canada by bus.

God wants me to continue¹⁸

I had been planning to give up my weightlifting after the 17th, but the Supreme Himself has asked me to continue. This weightlifting brings joy and inspiration to thousands and thousands of people. So I will be taking my lifting equipment to Brazil and I do hope that I can make some progress there.

The overworked camera¹⁹

Today Dhanu’s automatic camera overworked! As soon as I took up my position, before I lifted, it started clicking. I lifted 350 pounds in each arm twice. Then, even when I finished lifting, it did not stop. It went on clicking. I had to stop it manually.

The soul of Durdam's dog²⁰

Today, while I was cycling, the soul of Durdam’s dog Boomer came to watch me. Boomer died just recently.

Usually, the bell on my stationary bike rings after ten minutes and I stop cycling, but this morning when it rang I had not finished the specific meditation that I wanted to do, so I had to continue.

A problem with the video cameras²¹

Today again Mridanga’s video is out of order. Yesterday it was jam; today it is jelly.

Then, when I tried to do my 500 pounds with one arm, it was hopeless. I could not place my left foot properly because the wall was so near. Hotel rooms are so small!

All my joy went away²²

Unfortunately, Dhanu’s automatic camera was not working today when I went to lift 350 pounds in each arm. It started clicking as soon as I touched the dumbbell. Then, while I was still taking deep breaths before lifting, the film ran out. By the second lift, all my joy had gone away. So much discouragement I get from these cameras!

Totally lost²³

Today the video did not work at all. I am lost between Buffalo and Ipswich. In case you do not know, Dhanu is from Buffalo and Mridanga is from Ipswich.

After the “Runners are Smilers” race, I walked on the beach in front of the hotel for 1,000 metres.

Exercising in a prison cell²⁴

When I enter into my weightlifting room in this hotel, I feel that prison cells are better. So many huge machines are there, so many cameras, lights. I feel that I cannot breathe. Every second I have to look at my feet to see what is happening, or at my shoulders to make sure I do not bump into a piece of machinery. How can one concentrate?

Swami Vivekananda's encouragement-presence²⁵

For the last few months, Swami Vivekananda has been coming every morning to watch my weightlifting. Today I did not start lifting until after eight o’clock, so I did not think that he would come. While I was standing under my 800 pounds, from the left side he came and threw his turban at me. He threw it in such a way that it fell on my head. He was upset that I had doubted his presence.

Swami Vivekananda said to me, “I do not come here to help you in your lifting. I come here to get joy. You are fighting against matter and that is giving me tremendous joy.”

I promised him that on the 12th of this month I will sing seven songs of his.

Ketan's suggestion²⁶

Yesterday Ketan suggested that I do my one-arm pushes with 500 pounds before I do my lifting with both arms. Usually I do them afterwards, but a few months ago I did them before as a warm-up. So today I followed his suggestion and I did feel that it helped my double-arm lift.

My self-portrait²⁷

This morning after using my moving bench press machine, I took two photos of myself while I was meditating looking in the mirror.

Such a horrible noise!²⁸

Today when I was doing 50 one-arm pushes with 500 pounds, the machine was making such a horrible noise! Unmilan says it is quite safe. But I felt I was pushing not only 500 pounds but also my two 400-pound dumbbells. The whole thing is one unit and it was moving each time I pushed against it. The machine was giving me such a hard time!

The first day of my 1,000-pound lift²⁹

Today I lifted 1,000 pounds with both arms for the first time — 500 in each arm. When it came to the fourth lift, I turned on the camera and it went so well. Then I lifted it four more times.

Can you imagine — 1,000 pounds! Is it believable? It is not physical force; it is supernatural. Luckily my back is all right. No wonder why I am shrinking! From 5’8” why did I have to come to 5’7”?

Normally when weightlifters reach a certain weight, a very appreciable weight, they advance by ten pounds at a time. Many years ago I also did that. Now I go by 100 pounds.

Today my bodyweight is 170½ pounds. So I have lifted almost six times my own bodyweight. No matter how you look at it, the fact is that I am dashing against 1,000 pounds with my 170 pounds.

I am so lucky that today the still pictures worked and the video also worked.

Transported by the organ music³⁰

Today while I was cycling on my stationary bike, I was listening to a tape of my organ music. I was saying to myself, “How can I be the player? It is transporting me to the highest Heaven.”

I could not imagine that I was playing. I continued cycling for half an hour.

My symbolic lifting³¹

After lifting 1,000 pounds with both arms I got the inspiration to go directly to 1,300 pounds. Today was my first attempt at lifting 1,300 pounds with both arms simultaneously — 650 in each arm. Before lifting, I announced, “Today will be my symbolic lifting. God alone knows how many years and months it will take me to actually lift the weight.”

For the first lift, I gave myself zero. But when I did the second lift, my third eye was telling me that my left arm went up a little. My human eyes were telling me that it is all foolishness.

Then, when it came to the third lift, definitely the push was coming. For the fourth lift, I turned on the camera and the result was very good. The fifth lift happened to be the best. I then did it two more times. The fourth, fifth, sixth and seventh lifts are all noticeable and visible. Today, on the very first day, it has gone practically as high as 1,000 pounds. So you can see, impossibility is not to be found in our aspiration-dedication-journey.

I did not take any stretching exercises or use any other machines beforehand. I said, “Since I depend entirely on the Supreme, why do I have to take stretching exercises?” Only I took a shower. This is how stupidity entered.

For me, it is nothing short of a miracle and again, there is no such thing as a miracle at the Feet of our Beloved Supreme. This is called Grace. From 900 to 1,000 pounds, it took four days. Then today I lifted 1,300 pounds on the very first day. On the 13th of April I will do it so that even the blind can see!

I never, never imagined that with this 300-pound increment I would be able to succeed on the very first day. So it is one hundred per cent due to the Grace of the Supreme. That is why after the lift I said, “Indeed, a mystic journey in the weightlifting world.”

Something historical has taken place³²

It seems that something historical has taken place today. Only future generations will appreciate it. This morning, at 8:37, I embarked on this journey and at 8:56 I completed it. I said it would be a very, very, very long journey, but when the Compassion-flood descends from Above everything can take place in the twinkling of an eye. I never, never, never imagined that today I would be able to lift 1,300 pounds. That is why I used the term ‘mystic’. How can one increase by 300 pounds?

There is no such thing as impossibility when you entirely depend on the Will of God. But if you feel that you are the doer, then impossibility looms large.

My camera experience continues³³

Last night I decided to do my lifting after everybody had left my house. I started just after midnight with my cycling. Then I embarked on my 1,300 pounds. I lifted 1,300 pounds seven times and four of the lifts were to my satisfaction, specially the sixth lift.

Unfortunately, the boys who adjust the automatic camera did me a favour. On the fourth lift, I turned the camera on, but as soon as I started to bend my knees and go down, the way I usually do before lifting, the camera started clicking. I turned it off and then I lifted. So my fourth lift was not recorded.

For the fifth lift, I turned on the camera once again. Very gently I lowered myself into my lifting position, so that the camera would not start clicking. This time it captured my lift very nicely.

I did the same thing for my sixth and seventh lifts. My seventh lift was very good, but alas the camera ran out of film before the last push.

I do hope the camera can be adjusted. It is difficult for me when I cannot bend my knees and hang the way I am used to before I start pushing.

Building confidence³⁴

Today I lifted my 1,300 pounds six times. This is the twelfth day. Whichever day I am doing it, I am successful. So in that way I am gaining confidence. But, for some reason, I am not getting motivation to lift it higher.

Camera disappointment³⁵

Today was my camera-disappointment day. One boy fixed the automatic camera, but he fixed it worse than before. I lifted my 1,300 pounds six times, but the camera ran out of film after the fourth lift. My fifth and sixth lifts are not there. Not only that, but while fixing the automatic camera he somehow knocked the video camera as well, so that I am not completely in the picture. My camera experiences never end.

Subarata's soul is the witness³⁶

Today Subarata’s soul came to watch my weightlifting. Her soul left the body at 6:33 p.m. on Wednesday, March 15th, while I was in the plane on my way home from Bulgaria. That is when her soul came to me to say its final farewell. Her physical body passed away at 1:00 p.m. the following day.

Since she left the body, she has been all the time with me, in my house, watching me play my musical instruments. Today, as I was about to lift, her soul came to the doorway and said, “May I come in?”

I told her, “Now you are in the soul’s world. You can go anywhere you want to.”

She was so happy and excited. Usually I say that someone is like a seven-year-old child. But, in her case, she was like a five-year-old child.

She said to me, “I am so happy to be alone with you, Guru. I have never been alone with you before.”

Subarata's warning to the disciples³⁷

I was about to reach my cycle. I was in the middle of the doorway when Subarata’s soul begged me to allow her to give a special message to the disciples. So the prayer that I gave today is not actually my prayer. It is her warning to the disciples. The prayer is:

My Absolute Lord Supreme!
It is a very rare privilege
To feel and say
That my Master is always right
Not only for me,
But also for the entire humanity.

From the soul’s world, she is saying, “For God’s sake, do not think that your Master is wrong. Do not criticise him.”

At least one person has to believe in me! Subarata’s love for me was absolutely sincere and genuine.

Subarata and the pulley machine³⁸

When I went to use my pulley machine, Subarata’s soul said to me, “You are so strong. You are the strongest man in the world!” I was pulling a certain weight.

I said to her, “You can try it if you like.”

She said, “How can I? I am not in the body.”

I said, “Definitely you can do it. Just try.”

So she tried it and she was able to do it easily. The soul is part of the omnipotent God, so the soul can easily accomplish things that we find so difficult on the physical plane.

This is the funniest story.

One of these days³⁹

Today, for the first time, I can feel that my 1,300 pounds are going straight up. While they are coming down, you can see that the dumbbells are rolling, but while going up, they are going straight, not slanting. If I can lift just a little higher, a quarter of an inch or a half an inch, then the television people will see it clearly.

One of these days, confidence will come and I will create a new sensation.

Age in reverse⁴⁰

Today while cycling I listened to the Invocation and then one of Swami Vivekananda’s songs sung by a great Bengali singer. You can see how fast my legs are going in time with the music. When I was under thirty I could have cycled like that, but I do not think I have reached the same speed since then.

What a sound!⁴¹

Today my seated double-arm lift with 160 pounds on each side I have done the highest in this life. I did it twice. The second time, I could not believe what a sound it made. It went so high that it made a loud sound when it fell down again. On both sides, you can clearly see the gap when it goes up. I have never lifted 160 pounds so high. Paree was able to see it even without her glasses.

I felt the movement⁴²

This is the fifth day that I have done the seated calf raise since we came back from the Christmas trip. The first time I went up to 800 pounds. Then, for four days, I did 1,000 pounds — which is my maximum. Now Bishwas has added more weights to my machine. Today I wanted to try 1,100 pounds. I went up to 1,000 pounds. You can see it on the video. Just focus your eyes below the white numbers and you will see it move. Then I went to 1,100 pounds. I did it three times. The first two times, it did not move but the third time I felt the vibration. I definitely felt a movement, but it did not go up.

Television people are not blind⁴³

My 1,300-pound two-arm lift today is absolutely the highest. When you compare the up and down photos, you can see how it closes the gap and touches the bar. Television people will gladly take it today. They are not blind. But I want to make it even higher.

Today I did it six times. The first three lifts were warming up. When I warm up, I have to see if my shoulders are in good condition, if my elbows are in good condition. Then I do my serious lifting. This time the fourth to the sixth lifts are all good, but the sixth lift is super-excellent. I have watched it at least ten times.

And today is India Day. Both the Taj Mahal and Brindaban have joined our Peace-Blossom programme today. So God is telling us that He wants us to be dynamic. He does not want lethargy any more.

Unimaginable cycle speed⁴⁴

All of a sudden, my cycle speed has gone quite high. Three weeks ago it happened. I cannot imagine how. Today I was listening to organ music and I was going so fast. I said to Govinda, “Flatter me, but do not flatten me!”

The British have won⁴⁵

The first magazine article has come out about my 1,300-lb. lift with both arms. My Bhavani has done this. A British jockey has won the race. Britain has defeated America. She has defeated Agraha and everybody.

It is an excellent article and the title also is very striking: “A Man of God-Strength.” The picture has come out very well.

Cycling and moving my arms⁴⁶

This morning when I was cycling, I was listening to a tape of Bengali songs. I was also singing along with the tape and I was moving my hands all around in the air while I was singing. It went on for 10 minutes and 27 seconds. Now I will make dancing movements!

Mechanically lifting⁴⁷

This morning I was just doing my lifting mechanically because I had so many inner problems to deal with. I did not even take any stretching exercises. Only I took a shower. Sometimes ten minutes under warm water does the work of one hour’s stretching.

No warming up⁴⁸

Yesterday what was I doing? I was at PS 86 for eight hours, so today all my inspiration has disappeared. Today is inspirationless! This is the third day I have not warmed up properly. A shower is my warming up. I must not do these things. How long can God’s Grace last?

While I was watching the video of my morning lifts, I told Garima to come very close to the television screen, otherwise she would not be able to see the actual lift.

The tight weightlifting belt⁴⁹

I have gained weight today by eating Indian food yesterday. When I put on the weightlifting belt, my stomach was bulging because the belt was so tight. I am fat, but I am not as fat as the belt shows!

Chinese exercises⁵⁰

Today, while cycling, I was stretching my hands in every direction to exercise my upper portion. It looked like I was doing Chinese tai chi exercises.

Thirty years ago, if I could have done this speed in the 24-hour cycling race in Central Park, I could have covered many more miles.

10 April 2000