Question: For two weeks or so I may be in a high consciousness, but then my consciousness begins to descend. How can I sustain a high consciousness for an indefinite period?
Sri Chinmoy: First of all, I would like to tell you that you are not alone in your suffering. All spiritual aspirants, with no exception, have gone through these ups and downs in their spiritual life. Sometimes we feel that we are walking through beautiful green forests and meadows. But then we find ourselves walking through deserts in scorching heat.Many spiritual Masters have also had such experiences before realising God, even though their standard is infinitely higher than that of the average aspirants. They sometimes have to experience these spiritual deserts. In the case of some Masters this spiritual dryness lasts for a short period, while for others it lasts for a long, long time. They have to journey millions of miles in the spiritual life. But sometimes, even when they are on the verge of realising the highest Truth, the darkest doubt eclipses their vision and they doubt the very existence of God. Fortunately, the Divine Grace intervenes and saves them from a catastrophe. It does not allow them to fail in their mission.
Now, in your case, I wish to tell you that as a seeker, as an earnest aspirant, every day you must make it a point to meditate. Just as you eat every day to maintain your physical strength, in the spiritual life you must meditate every day, because meditation is your spiritual food. True, you may not get your highest meditation every day, but that must not discourage you. You may not meditate well for a time, but do not give up. You will see that, like a kite, you will again fly very high.
In the spiritual life we should always try to be wise. The thought, the idea, the feeling that is not helpful has to be discarded like a dirty or worn-out garment. When you don’t have a good meditation, just forget about it. I always say that the past is dust. Try to throw the past aside as soon as possible. On the other hand, if you have a good meditation today, that does not mean that tomorrow you have to think of today’s meditation. By doing that you are again relying on your past. Instead of thinking of your previous meditation, even a good meditation, you will make better use of your time if you pay more attention to your future self-discovery. If you start your meditation by thinking of the wonderful, significant meditation you had on the previous day, you will experience joy. But at that time you have to know that you are withdrawing the money that you have deposited in your inner spiritual bank instead of adding to the amount.
When you start your meditation, try to go deep within and feel that you exist only for one person on earth and that is God. In the spiritual life, there should be someone whom you can call your dearest and that is God, the Supreme. The Supreme has to be dearest not only to the end of our life, but through Eternity. Every day if you can increase your faith in God, then every day you are bound to have your best meditation.
Why do some people seem to have their best meditation every day? The main reason is that they renew their faith, love, devotion and surrender to God every day. Love, devotion and surrender is my path. Some people will say it is inscribed on the tablet of their heart. But that won’t do. Every day you have to write it afresh with golden letters. Every day you have to feel that you are making a new attempt. The day you entered into the spiritual life, you offered your existence to God. But that offering was not complete and even today’s offering is not complete. If you feel that your offering is complete today, tomorrow when you go deep within you will laugh at yourself and feel that you are far from perfect. But either tomorrow or in the near future or in the distant future, this offering is bound to become complete. Again, there is no end to our progress, no end to our achievement.
I wish to tell you that you can prevent depression in your meditation. You can have a feeling of achievement, a feeling of accomplishment from your meditation if you renew your love, devotion and surrender and think of God every day. Try to wear a new dress within yourself. Every day you wear a nice, clean dress to satisfy yourself and to satisfy the outside world. It is necessary and obligatory to do so. Similarly, in the inner world also it is obligatory to wear gold, blue, pink, white and green. When we wear blue, we enter into Infinity; when we wear green, we enter into dynamic new life; when we wear gold, we enter into the highest realisation and manifestation. Every day please try to wear an inner dress inside yourself. When you are wearing an inner dress, you will see that all your love, devotion, surrender and other divine qualities are bound to come to the fore. Then you will become a fresh flower, a flower of inner beauty, inner divinity and transcendental reality. You will see that every day is bound to give you progress. Every second will come to you with the message of progress and inner success. So please try from now on to renew all your divine qualities each day, early in the morning. You will then see that there can be no clouds in your inner sky. It is all sunshine.
