The Master's smiles
When there is an opportunity, we should take full advantage of that opportunity. God alone knows whether I shall come back to China once more in this incarnation. There is no possibility right now for me to come back in three years or four years. That is why we are trying to offer as much as possible.Similarly, you have to feel that if there is an opportunity for you to stay a little longer here on our Christmas Trip, you should take it. I do not want your Divine Enterprise to suffer, but in your absence for two or three weeks, it is not going to collapse. The experiences that you have, and the joy that you get here by staying even one day more, enter into your heart. Then your love for me increases. Your heart tells you, “My Guru says so many things to give me joy. It is all his love for me.” What is more important, business or the Master’s presence? Once you accept the spiritual life, the Master’s smiles, even the Master’s scoldings are all blessings, blessings.
When I was at the Sri Aurobindo Ashram, the Mother would be driven in a car. Once I happened to be on a particular street. I did not know that the Mother would be there. The Mother passed by in her car, and all of a sudden she saw me and smiled a little. That smiling face lasted so vividly in my heart for two weeks. I could not believe that she passed by me. It was quite unexpected, and I am sure she never thought that she would see me. But when she saw me, she gave me a smile that lasted so strongly inside my heart for two weeks. One little smile from the Mother increased our love for her so much. That is what the Mother’s smile used to do.
Again, she also showed me affection when she scolded me with a cute slap! Why? The Mother did not want the disciples to go to any other spiritual Centres, but once I went. I pretended that I had her permission.
I had to go before the Mother every day. Early in the morning after my adventure, my time came. My boss, Nolini, said, “Mother is waiting for you!” Everybody was trembling with fear. The Mother gave me a cute slap and said, “When did I give you permission?”
Again, that cute slap she gave out of affection. I was remembering that slap for three months, because I knew it was out of affection that she gave it to me. It was not like an ordinary mother becoming furious and saying, “You rogue!” The Mother said I had done something wrong, but she was full of affection when she gave me the slap. I remember that affection. It was not out of anger that she did it. I felt in that slap so much cute affection she was pouring into me, while she was asking why I had done this kind of thing.
After I joined the Ashram, for two years or even more, I used to go to the Mother three times a day, sometimes four times. Three times I went on a regular basis. Every time I went, my physical mother’s eyes I saw in the Divine Mother’s eyes. Inside the Divine Mother’s eyes I would see my physical mother’s eyes, for two years. When my physical mother was dying, she said to me, “Go, go — go to the Divine Mother.” The Divine Mother was showing this little boy, “I am your mother.”
A little affection lasts for a long time! Again, in the case of some people, no matter how much one gives them, they want more, more. The more one gives them, the more demands they make. Even if their spiritual Master has blessed them for five minutes, if the Master then looks at another disciple for five seconds, everything is lost! Even if the Master has poured and poured his blessings into a disciple, that disciple may feel that the Master looked at the second one more powerfully. Then all the first disciple’s inner wealth disappears.
But in the case of some of my disciples, even if I do not look at them for five days, they will not mind, because their hearts are so deep inside me. Their hearts are right here, inside my heart, so they will never care if I look at someone else for five minutes. They will say, “Whatever I need, Guru is giving me; I know it.” So much love they have for me, and so much faith they have in me.
20 December 2004, Xiamen, China.↩