511. Alas, how can I?

I want to be happy.
But alas, how can I,
When others are surpassing me?

I want to be happy.
But alas, how can I,
When others are governing me?

I want to be happy.
But alas, how can I,
Since I have not pleased my Inner Pilot,
Not even once?

I want to be happy.
But alas, how can I,
Since I know I can never be
What I want to be?